Vinyl Spackle and Other Crimes Against Load-Bearing Walls
I witnessed a felony against physics last Tuesday over on Balmoral Street. Some twenty-something kid in spotless Blundstone boots was trying to repair the side of a detached garag…
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Behind the songs—sort of.
No Store Credit for Emotional Square Footage
Never start a custom ensuite demolition without a signed contract. I learned that the hard way with Joanne down on Arthur Street. She wanted a luxury walk-in shower with oil-rubbe…
Holding It Level
A realtor named Todd called me in mid-November with a cash job over on South Algoma. He said the property just needed a "light sweep." Todd wears loafers in the snow. His definiti…
Load-Bearing Hope on Banning Street
There’s a brick two-story on Banning Street that the city has been trying to bulldoze since 2011. It caught fire twice. Once from bad basement wiring, and once from a guy named 'T…
Red Ink and Moulded Plastic
I sat in the moulded-plastic chairs at the Victoriaville Civic Centre for three hours on Tuesday. If you want to know what purgatory feels like, it’s waiting for a ticket number t…
Red-Tagged Heart
I told the city inspector it was just surface spall. A cosmetic crack. Nothing a bucket of parging couldn't hide. He looked at me over his clip-on sunglasses, then pointed at the …
In-Floor Heating and Brazilian Cherry Hardwood
My ex-wife’s sister, Franca, wanted a finished basement rec room back in '08. I told her forced air was a mistake down there. You need boiler-fed PEX tubing under six inches of wi…
The $3,000 November Ice Rink
Arrogance Don't Check the Weather It was mid-November out on Oliver Road. The thermometer was sitting at a crisp minus fifteen. I had a twenty-by-twenty detached garage pad to pou…
Fast, Cheap, and Illegal: The Shebandowan Hot Tub Incident
A guy named Bryce from Mississauga bought a summer camp out at Shebandowan last October. He tracked me down because he wanted a poured concrete pad for a six-person therapeutic Ja…